Holy cr*p!

So here's a cute little story, some American chap thinks he's had a message from Yahweh, not a burning bush or a bolt of lightening of course but a splat of bird poo on his windscreen that looks like Jesus (how would we know?). The opportunities for making fun of this kind of thing are like the traditional Christian view of their glorious leader, i.e. infinite, which is strange since this Christian at least thinks he's a shit communicator. (phnar phnar)

There were 10 in the bed and the little one said..

I read that Catholic Cardinal Keith O'Brien has quit his post today. O'Brien is someone I've blogged about several times before regarding his seemingly arrogant and antiquated outbursts on social subjects such as same sex marriage, secularism and abortion when such views appeared in the media. I must confess that it's with a smidgen of  schadenfreude that I see accusations regarding his own (alleged) dubious behaviour have forced him to resign his position only weeks away from retirement.

Against the backdrop of the Pope himself stepping down and various birds coming home to roost regarding the sexual and financial in-proprietaries of several of the candidates in the new leadership race any casual observer could and probably should reasonably conclude that the whole damn organisation is rotten to the core and long overdue for a complete overhaul.

Hopefully justice will prevail and hopefully rational and fair-minded people will not loose sight of the fact that it's not same sex marriage that's "grotesque and unnatural" as Mr O'Brien puts it, rather, it's the ludicrous adherence of certain religions to obsessive, outdated and misogynistic ideas about reality, specifically the realities of human Biology. If O'Brien is found guilty and is truly a moral man he will have a fantastic opportunity to help many other people in similar quandaries by simply admitting that he was wrong and by encouraging people to accept the realities of their own Biology and not cling onto unnatural and harmful abstinences.

Homeopathic cartoon

Atheist Church Services

Here's a wacky idea I came across today, Atheist Church. Well more like church with a small "c" I suppose but it does sound a lot like the other kind to me, with someone at the front talking, audience participation and singing songs etc. I'm not convinced this would be for me. I'd be the one sitting at the back thinking of all the things I could be doing with the time, like enjoying the one life I have, but I can certainly appreciate how some people might feel the need for the community and ritual aspects of a regular gathering like this, albeit minus the supernatural parts.

There was one thing I liked, a clever inversion of Pascal's wager which goes like this,

"In the absence of firm evidence for any particular God, why not to live your life as though it is the only one you have? Every moment will be sweeter, every minute more precious. Then, if there is a God, they will doubly reward you for living a good life without the bribe of heaven, or the threat of hell."

Job hunting?

Saw this today, fine Friday (fun) material..

Dumb news

Ever since the Pope resigned yesterday superstitious people have been scrambling around trying to find some omen to tell them if it's a good thing or the signalling of the start of the "end-times", as they do. The mainstream media picked up on a story that a bolt of lightening struck St. Peters Basilica in Rome a few hours after the announcement, this story has been leapt upon by credulous people worldwide. What a natural imbalance of electrical charge in the atmosphere has to do with job vacancies in the Vatican I'm not too sure, but those among us more prone to believing in the power of non sequitur clearly think it's a sign from their big man in the sky.

This kind of thing always amuses me, if these people really think that their God communicates with us via electrical discharges then why put lightening conductors on tall buildings like churches? Surely this is as "contra Deus" as wearing one of those little rubber thingies, you know, those "man-focused" temporary coverings that also prevent unwanted consequences from other kinds of discharges, a theological quandary if ever there was one.

So the search for a replacement Pope begins, much like organised religion itself really a process involving the perpetuation of worldly self interest wrapped up in mystery, ritual and obfuscation in order to elevate it above the mundane affairs of its "flock" and secure their reverence  The Cardinals need not vex themselves too much though, I'm pretty sure I know who should take over. The answer to their prayers was revealed to me in a dream, there exists a perfectly qualified person; a person who lives in Italy, is not a Woman, definitely not gay, used to handling obscene amounts of money, power and arrogance and to cap it all he's currently looking for a job...

All hail Pope Silvio...

Atheists for Jesus

Following on from the Super Bowl post last week I happened across this, it's some kind of advertisement for Atheism. Very nicely made but slightly odd viewed through English eyes, what's it for I ask myself? I imagine that it plays out better in America where Atheists are certainly under a lot more pressure from the various aggressive religious factions there. I suspect that just having something to accompany the overt (and pervasive) public religious messaging stateside makes non-believing people feel better or maybe it's aimed at provoking fence-sitters, who knows, it's a free country as they say.

ex-Popes

In what sounds like the beginnings of a Monty Python sketch I read today that we now have an "ex-pope", Pope Benedict having quit his post as "Vicar of Christ on Earth" via the somewhat mundane act of releasing a resignation press release through international media channels this morning (what no angels?)...

I'm intrigued, does this mean Herr Ratzinger is now fallible again, will he wake up tomorrow morning, stumble down to breakfast bleary-eyed like the rest of us mortals only to stub his toe on the kitchen table leg and swear like a trooper? The world needs to know! I'd love to be at his next job interview too, so Herr Ratzinger, why did you leave your last job, personal development opportunities not good enough? Did you feel like you were in a bit of a dead end, was your boss simply not listening to you?

Seriously though, I can't help thinking there's some massive revelation about some horrible scandal just about to break across the worlds media, I do hope not.

Super-natural Bowl

Here's a scary statistic, 27% of Americans think that "God" (presumably their God) has a hand in determining the outcome of the Super Bowl. Wow, how conceited can some people get? To think that God would take time out from ruthlessly slaughtering African children by the 000s every day in order to preside over a silly game of football, and not even real football at that!

Dem bones etc.

I read with interest that the bones found under a car park in Leicester are indeed those of late King of England Richard III. DNA tests have confirmed royal genealogy and carbon dating has placed the body at the temporal scene of Richards' last battle Bosworth, where he was killed in action and York begat Tudor as the name of the leading crime family in medieval England, the rest is history as they say. (cue lots of infantile scatological jokes about Leicester)

Wondrous Life of Brian

A new BBC science series started yesterday, called the "Wonders of Life" it's been advertised all week and is fronted by the ubiquitous Prof. Brian Cox, so, at 9 pm I settled down on the sofa with a nice Thornbridge IPA and tuned in.

The first thing that became clear was that this program will almost certainly generate a lot of "letters" to the BBC from quivering Christian and Muslim apologists who will probably be offended by the lack of deference to their various myths. Brian Cox is a fairly outspoken rationalist, he doesn't believe in God(s) and is outspoken on the subject of woo-woo (i.e. things like homoeopathy and astrology) this was clear from the outset. Life as he described it is a natural process, no need for magical spirits or souls and science should be able to explain everything about it using only the laws of physics. He's got all the evidence on his side of course but as the words were emerging from my TV speaker I was thinking about all those tedious CIF comments espousing "mystery", "fundamentalist atheists" and "you never know..". It was refreshing to watch something that went to the heart of things and took a strong position rather than the usual dancing around the handbags when it comes to public broadcasts and the origins of life / nature of conciousness etc. Creationists be damned.

As for the content, I quite liked it, I learned a few things and overall I though that it handled some complex topics with reasonable examples and analogies whilst not dumbing down too much. The filmography was slightly cheesy (lots of stunning backdrops, unnecessary helicopter shots and dramatic music) but then again his hero is Carl Sagan so what do you expect. I recorded it for my kids to watch at an earlier time, that's usually the acid test for me, if it holds their attention for an hour then it's all good in my book.

Lines on the map (and in our heads)

Once we've voted on whether the UK wishes to remain in Europe or not I think we should vote on our position in the North Atlantic, personally I've always preferred the Mediterranean, the food is so much more interesting and the wine situation incomparable. Then we should sort out the thorny issue of planet Earth, I find the gravity here limiting, somewhere with less mass would be much better for those of us reaching a certain age and starting to suffer minor niggles with our backs and joints, isn't the democratic process wonderful.

Time flies like bullets at an NRA open day..

Where has January gone? Last time I looked at my watch it was new year, and now it feels like everyone is well and truly gripped by a bad dose of the mid-January blues. Apparently the 21st of January is the most depressing day of the year, I wouldn't argue, what with the mildly inclined road I live on under 2 inches of solid ice; every morning is an angst filled adventure. Will I make it to the main road or will I join all the other under-qualified ice-drivers in the front garden of the nice (but rather depressed) man who lives at the bottom of the hill.

Anyway at least the kids are having fun throwing ever more discoloured snow around at every possible opportunity. Mine get home from school looking like they've been dragged through a cold car wash backwards but at least they have rosy cheeks and smiles on their faces unlike most of the adults arriving at my office in the misty first light of morning; they grasp their cups of tea in clenched hands and stare unblinkingly into the middle distance as their stress levels and core temperatures return to normal.

Still, mustn't grumble, there is always someone worse off than you, spare a thought for the many people killed or injured from accidental shootings whilst attending the recent NRA "Gun Appreciation Day" event in America, I suppose at least they now appreciate the problem with guns, well, the ones that aren't dead.

What discrimination?

Looks like the European courts have junked all but one of the recent religious discrimination appeals although the one upheld was certainly the case that made the least practical sense. The ECHR upheld the appeal of Nadia Eweida who back in 2006 had a job as a check-in clerk for BA and was told not to wear a piece of jewellery which happened to be a cross on a necklace. At the time BA had a very strict policy on jewellery (which I can sort of understand for public facing roles) regardless of the religious significance or otherwise. The BA rules have since changed (2007) and interestingly Nadia still works there, so I guess she forgave them. In any case I'm not sure where it says that Christians must wear crosses, I always thought fishes were the approved symbol, then again, I'm no theologian. Perhaps one of my religious readers could point me to the verse that says "And Jesus said, take this rather delicate and attractive 9 carat necklace and wear it in remembrance of me...and perhaps a nice little brooch sometimes too"?

The downside of claiming the moral highground

Here is a fascinating insight into the mind of a Catholic apologist, his article is from 2011 before the Jimmy Savile scandal was unpleasantly inserted into our conciousness. The author of the piece is irate that the press would report on the death of a celebrity like Savile (who died in 2011) elaborating on his many charitable and voluntary acts but not reporting on where these things came from, which according to the author was the fact that Savile had "faith" and was a devout Catholic attending regular Mass. The choice of quotes in the article about the fallen star is (with hindsight) chilling, the author particularly likes the question Savile is reported as asking Broadmoor inmates, “what do you want to go round strangling crumpet for?”.

The problem with this kind of claim of course is what happens when it all goes wrong, as it invariably does, and the people you hold up as leading lights of your faith/political party/race/nationality etc. turn out to be nothing more than ordinary, weak, flawed and sometimes monstrous human beings. If religious people of any flavour feel inclined to attribute good things like charity, flowers, sunshine and puppies to their particular omnipotent Deity then they also need to accept the logical necessity of attributing the bad as well, suffering, disease, hate and child molesting ex-BBC presenters.

I maybe sometime

Here's an interesting idea, retrace our species ' "long walk" out of Africa through the Middle East, Asia, North and South America to the furthest point of our colonisation of the planet Tierra del Fuego at the Southern tip of the American continent, and do it all like they did, i.e. on foot.

It's estimated that humans made this migration around 45,000 years ago although there is evidence of earlier migrations 65,000 years ago and as many as 100,000 years ago, in any case even at walking speed this journey will only take US journalist Paul Salopek 7 years to complete (and he won't be walking every day). Of course it's not likely that early humans did the trip in a oner as Salopek will, most of them probably found a nice spot along the way somewhere and stayed a few generations before moving on. Even when they did some must have left the odd tribe behind since we now see people that are physically adapted to the climate and environments of their chosen plots along the route. Its also interesting to consider the land bridge that must have existed at some point between Asia and America during this period, we already know from fossil evidence that other species made this same journey back and forth much earlier (Bison, Horses, Bears etc.) but even during warmer periods the crossing must have been a fantastically daunting proposition for barefoot primates equipped only with with fur coats, stone tools and curious minds.

How do you know you're old?

I remember seeing my first personal computer when I was 16 years old, I thought it was amazing, the size of 4 bread bins stacked on top of each other and a tiny monochrome screen with a resolution of  40 X 25 characters. In the picture above we have a potty with an integral iPad mount, perish the thought that little junior could go more that 15 minutes without a full colour, high resolution, internet connected, multi-core multi-media, touch sensitive computing experience; that's progress I suppose.

This photo did make me think though, a device like this could be quite handy for those excruciatingly long meetings with arty agency types who bang on interminably about how wonderful Apple products are and how "they just work", no need for even the shortest comfort break.

Perspective..

Here's a chilling photo for you, it shows (amazingly) the super massive black hole at the centre of our galaxy and the white stuff is matter (planets, stars etc.) being sucked in and mashed.

We tend to think of our cosmic backyard in the universe as safe, unchanging perhaps boring even, but as this picture shows even our own neighbourhood we have some pretty scary stuff going on. Once black holes start digesting stuff then you tend to end up with chaos, beams of matter blasting out at nearly the speed of light, bursts of high energy X- and gamma rays, and pretty much annihilation for anything with a few hundred light years. Fortunately for us our galaxy is a hundred thousand light years wide and we're located out in the sticks, so we're safe... for now.

Autocorrection

We've all been there, pesky auto-correct software on mobile phones that messes around with the banal, poorly spelt and grammatically incorrect stuff we type and turns it into pure comedy gold. Follow the link here to see more of the same although be careful if you're in an office, you will laugh out loud.

News me

I spotted a couple of interesting stories on the BBC site today. First we have news that the oldest man in the UK has died at the grand old age of 110, wow now that's a pretty decent innings! It made me think, imagine having the title of being the "oldest" person in any given population, a cursed position if ever there was one.

I also spotted this little Biology story, it's about restoring the sight of mice by transplanting photoreceptor (light sensitive) cells into their eyes. The hope is that similar treatments might be developed that help humans with degenerative sight disorders, I must admit though I was distracted by thought that there was probably only 3 mice and the scientists probably spent a lot of time watching them run.

Lastly we have the on-going saga of gay people and the slightly weird simultaneous obsession and revulsion that organised religion has with them. This time it's my favourite state religion, the Church of England and their recent decision to allow gay men to become Bishops so long as they don't actually have gay sex with anyone. It amuses me how otherwise normal educated people can support the idea that an all powerful omnipotent deity really cares where certain men put their penis. This is doubly baffling to me since this edict is clearly taken from a book Christians supposedly revere (the Bible) that also endorses slavery and treats rape as property crime among many other things that modern Christians would abhor.