Summary of the Trump budget..

• NASA granted $350 to fund upcoming manned mission to Mars
• Greatly expands State Department’s available office space
• Allocates $1 billion for across-the-board revitalization of nation’s under-performing prisons
• Defense budget raised to achieve long-standing goal of removing ballistic missiles from endangered weaponry list
• Sea level increased by 4 percent
• Unconscionable amount slashed from costume budget for Cincinnati Ballet’s spring production of Petrushka
• Larger Department of Veterans Affairs budget to accommodate upcoming spike in cases of PTSD
• Pretty much in line with everyday Americans’ demand for more guns and fewer books, paintings, parks, doctors, schools, corruption investigations, scientists, and animals

*Courtesy of the Onion..