Old jokes re-worked

It was the Pope's investiture ceremony and as the crowds made their way across Saint Peter's square toward the Basilica, a Rottweiler suddenly lunged towards an eight year old girl, with its jaws wide open ready to attack. The crowd nearby gasped in horror but, quick as a flash, a man jumped out of the crowd, grabbed the dog by the throat and throttled it. As the dead dog lay there, and the crowd cheered in admiration, a journalist from the Catholic Herald who had witnessed the heroic deed, went up to the man and said, 'That was brilliant, I can see the headline now –

'Catholic Hero Saves Young Girl From Certain Death'. The man replied, 'No you've got it wrong. I'm not a Catholic!' 'Don't worry' said the journalist, 'I can see the headline now –

'Christian Hero Saves Girl From Jaws Of Rottweiler'. The man replied, 'No you're wrong again. I'm not a Christian; I'm an atheist'

The journalist said, 'Don't worry; I can see the headline now – 'Atheist Bastard Strangles Family Pet'